Category: You

Reset

It’s not always a good idea to “go for it”. Sometimes you just need to Reset.

There is a concept of resetting the point when it comes to playing a sport (specially racquet sports) against an opponent. If you get into a position where you cannot hit a winner nor can you hit a dominating shot, you need to reset the point.

Resetting just means that you are giving the other person a bit of an easy ball but not something they can kill either and dominate you. It’s meant to reset the point so you can get back into position with the ability to dominate offensively. So ideally, when you reset the ball, nobody gets the point on the next shot. The competition continues on the shots after that as you wait for the right timing to “go for it “.

This is the same thing in life as well. Sometimes you just need to reset yourself and the situation. Instead of going on the offense all the time, sometimes you just need to reset your mind, body and soul.

Resetting this way clears up any bad energy present and makes space for good energy to come naturally. Then when you feel that good energy present in your mind, body and soul, that’s the time to go on the offense and “go for it!”

Resilience to Failure, Ridicule and “No”

The path to success goes through getting good at being resilient to failure, ridicule and hearing the word “no” and being OK with that.

That’s what sets apart extraordinary folks compared to the ordinary 99% of the population.

One song workouts

Don’t have time to work out but sick of what you see in the mirror?

Do this:
Whenever you have enough motivation and a few minutes to spare, go to a place where you have a few feet to move around, put your AirPods / earbuds in your ears and then start a motivational song from your playlist.

Do body based only exercises such as squats, donkey kicks, push-ups, sit-ups, and whatever else that does not require any special weights or equipment. Just rotate through things while listening to your body all the way through until the song ends.

That’s it. Take out the earbuds and go back to whatever you were doing before.

Extra bonus: workout to two songs 😊

Starting this simple routine and doing this once or twice a day will produce results you will not believe.

The answer to the question “how are you?”

What do you answer when someone asks you: how are you doing? (The infamous question we all get asked all the time right..)

Do you complain? Do you just say “good”? Do you wonder if you should focus on the good or the bad in your life? Do you feel hesitant not knowing what to really say and how deep to go? Do you just wish people stop asking you..??

We all go through this. And this question will never stop.

So what do you do?

Well, first thing is to understand the intention of the other person. Most people will just ask the “how are you” question just to get the conversation started because they don’t know any other way.

Others who truly care about how you are feeling most probably do not want a detailed step-by-step explanation of why you are feeling what you are feeling. They are just looking for a temperature check.

Either way, what you say to answer this question will actually manifest itself.
The universe is always listening. Believe it!

If you say you’re feeling terrible or how crappy of a day you are having, the universe will take that as a command and make things even crappier for you.
(and honestly the other person asking the question most probably can’t do much about your crappy day anyway so they will just say a word of sympathy and move on)

If you say wonderful or blessed or any other type of response that portrays gratitude for what you have, the universe will take that as a command also and give you more of that.

So why not just go with the second option and always speak words of gratitude? Chances are that you are better off than billions of people in this world anyway who would love to trade places with you if given a chance. So appreciate that and count your blessings 😊

Forget about the audience

To do your best work, you gotta forget about the audience.

Just like any tournament you participate in, any competition you compete in, if you focus on what will the audience think of you, you are for sure to not do your best because now you’re thinking about how others perceive of you instead of going for your best effort.

It’s the same with life. If you just focus on your activities, your mission, your effort, instead of worrying about others, you will feel a lot more satisfaction at the end.

Let others think about the audience and be limited. You do “You” and what’s in your hand and watch the magic unfold.

Losing self centeredness as you get older

You’re a kid. Everybody loves you and adores you. You feel like the universe revolves around you.

But then you get older and the adults don’t adore you anymore because you’re a grown up too now and they expect you to act like one – no matter your accomplishments.

No it is very much about – “What have you done for me lately?”

Aside from your immediate family, those who care for you and adore you only do so because of the way you make them feel and not because how awesome you are.

If you think about it, many of the characters that are portrayed as villains and films are very accomplished individuals who are smart, with grand ideas, and lots of money.

The one thing that all these villains have in common: selfishness.

They’re doing it all for themselves and their own ambitions and beliefs. Most of them don’t see themselves as villains either and have very strong beliefs that they feel are true.

So if you want to be accepted by society and acknowledged for who you are as you get older, remember that it’s not about you. It’s about the greater good and the society as a whole.

No one cares about you or your accomplishments.

They only care about how you make them feel with your words and actions.

Are you an imposter?

Imposter syndrome is real. Many people go through this phase of feeling like an imposter especially if they are put in a position or have reached a status which they don’t feel they deserve.

I went through this feeling in 2005 when I was asked to teach a software class after having learned the material just a couple of months ago myself and having been using this product (Microsoft SharePoint) for only a couple of years before that.

The master trainer for this class was a guy named Jeff Cate. I was the secondary trainer and not very confident in my capabilities as a trainer. Jeff asked me to introduce myself to the class before we begin.

I said something to the effect of:

“Hi, my name is Asif Rehmani. This is the first time I’m teaching this class. I don’t know that much about SharePoint but I’ll do the best I can.”

And then we started the class.

During the first break we had for the class, Jeff pulled me aside and gave me some advice on the introduction I had given.

I can’t remember his exact words since it was so long ago but they went something like this:

“Do you think you know more about this topic then these people in the class? And if yes, and I know you do because that’s why I invited you to teach this class, why would you not want the students in the class to have confidence in you? The introduction you gave did not instill confidence in your capabilities. I think you should think about that next time you give an introduction.”

That lesson has stuck with me through time.

I have taught literally hundreds of classes since that day to hundreds of thousands of students through in-person or virtual single day, multi-day classes, webinars and presentations at conferences.

Every time I doubt my capabilities as a trainer/educator and feel like an imposter, I remind myself that I don’t have to be a genius, and an all knowing person in the subject that I’m talking about.

I just need to have the right intentions to be able to impart at least some knowledge that the receiver did not have before. If they benefit from having listened to what I’m teaching, I’ve done my job. That’s it.

That simple fact has helped me throughout decades now.

My advice to anyone feeling like an impostor is to dig deep inside and ask yourself:

Are you adding value to your audience?

If you are, then you are not an imposter. It’s as simple as that.

Mentor the receptive ones

Not everyone is going to be receptive to hearing your brilliant thoughts, your ideas or learning your skills. No matter how much you believe how beneficial it can be for them. If they’re not open to receiving it, nothing will get through no matter what. That’s just how it is.

In fact, many of us realize once our kids get to a certain age that they are not interested in our insights, learnings and thoughts that we thought we would be transferring to them so they don’t have to go through the same hardships and failures we went through. Many of the times they’re just not receptive or open to them.

It breaks your heart when you feel you have so much wisdom and skills you want to pass on to your next of kin but either they’re not ready yet or they just don’t have interest in learning from You specifically.

This happens to the rich folks as well as poor ones. Powerful businessmen and those working at a 9 to 5 job. Elite athletes as well as those who don’t have an athletic bone in their body. No matter where you fall in the spectrum and who you are, chances are this will happen to you also to some degree.

So what do you do? Do you force your insights, your wisdom, your skills and aptitude to those who are not receptive? You’re just going to end up pushing them away and waste your time in the process.

This is where we have to remember that there’s always someone out there who is ready to receive the wisdom and skills that you have to share. In fact, out of the almost 8 billion humans that exist on Earth right now, there will be many people out there who can benefit from what you have to share and are ready to receive your wisdom.

So share away. It can be as easy as answering people’s questions online – forums, blogs, social media, commenting on articles, etc. Or if you are really driven, join an organization or start your own.

Whatever you do, just try not to leave this earth without leaving your pearls of wisdom scattered behind you for others to pick up.

Exploring the inner self

We as humans are mesmerized by space and by the depth of the oceans.

Astronauts and aquanauts are constantly trying to push the boundaries to explore further and deeper than anyone else has done before them. To find what’s really out there that we have not explored yet.

What many of us lack is the motivation to explore our own inner self. And those that are motivated don’t know where to start since there is no spaceship or a submersible that you can take to dive inside yourself.

This is where self exploration and the concept of introspection comes in.

Understanding yourself by diving inwards.

You can refer to this as meditation, mindfulness, being in the moment, self-realization or any other word that sounds good to you.

At the end, it’s all the same thing. Exploring the inner self way beyond the body and the mind.

Going deep to the place where the energy center resides.

The cost for this introspection: our time and the willingness to give up control.

Both things that many of us have a hard time giving up for something that none of our senses can perceive.

But if we do, the reward is truly priceless.