Category: You

The title might sound selfish but it’s true. You are the center of your universe. Emphasis on “Your” ☺️.

The question now is: are you going to be passive and let forces and people around you influence and impact you or are you going to be proactive and impact them instead?

Most people do the former because it’s easier to go with the flow. If they are surrounded with positive energies and people then the benefit from that or vice versa, if this round themselves with negativity and people who are always down, then that’s what they absorb.

The alternative to absorption is creation obviously. But as we all know, that is always more difficult to pull off because it requires initial momentum which is hard to conjure up for most of us.

So what are you going to do? Are you going to be creating content, information, and spreading goodness in the world from your core or are you going to let people and circumstance and things that encircle you act upon you and make an impression on you The way they want?

You can be the receiver or the producer.

The choice is yours.

I know it’s a hard thing to accept but every single one of us that is alive today will be forgotten eventually.

It might take a few generations, but unless you make a mark on the world like Rockefeller, Einstein, Hitler, etc (yes, good and bad…) there will come a day when no one in the world will remember your name. How they remember you is up to your actions.

The first death is when your breath leaves your body. The second death is when you have been forgotten from the thoughts of the people living.

Of course, then come the questions: why should I care about doing anything if I’m going to be forgotten anyway? What’s the point of living?

Since we come into this world with nothing and leave with nothing. What’s the point of it all?

The point is to not focus on the duration of life but the donation of yourself.

What’s in your hand? What can you do to benefit others no matter how small?

That’s where you and I both should focus on. The impact we can make on others and on the world. That’s what the meaning of life is all about. Leaving this world and the people in it better than how you found it when you arrived.

There’s a reason that flight attendants tell us to put on our own oxygen mask in case of emergency before helping others – even our young children.

Our instinct is to do whatever we can to help those whom we love. Especially our children that are like pieces of our hearts running around outside of our body. In case of emergency, we instinctively reach out to help them before helping ourselves.

The problem with helping your loved ones at the expense of your own well-being is that eventually you will run out of energy and capability yourself to be able to help them. Then they’ll be on their own anyway and that might be when they really really need you.

I have not always felt that way but I now strongly believe that it is our responsibility towards our loved ones to first take care of ourselves – both inner and outer selves. That means keeping our mind body and soul in shape to take on any challenges that come our way.

We owe it to ourselves and our loved ones to put our own oxygen mask on first. In fact, we need to do that not only at the time of an emergency but to do it regularly and proactively so we have readily available capability when our loved ones truly need us.

 

 

I totally believe in healthy competition. I tell my kids all the time the competition is a good thing. It drives you, it pushes you, it gives you a target.

Having said that, the best target to beat is your younger self. And when I say younger, it could be a minute younger, a week younger, a year younger. The idea is to beat the performance of your past self.

Many of us fall into the trap of comparing ourselves with others. The only result that comes out of that is second-guessing yourself and your own capabilities.

Now I’m not saying that we should completely ignore everyone around us and just focus on ourselves. It’s definitely good to look for inspiration all around us but there’s a fine line between inspiration and competition. Inspiration can be drawn from others but competition is best when done with your former self.

Just like when you run in track, the coach tells you to focus on your PR (personal record). Don’t worry if you come in last in the race, but do worry if you are not beating your own former PR.

If you are not improving yourself that just simply means you are not trying hard enough. If you are not beating others, there could be several factors affecting that which you cannot control. Don’t worry about that. The more you worry about that, the more miserable it’s going to make you and that doesn’t help move you further in life. Focus on what’s in your hands and keep on improving.

 

There’s actually a simple way to feeling fulfilled in life. The secret is:

Being useful to others.

It’s a guaranteed fact that will provide your life meaning which we all crave.

The challenge is it’s not always clear how we can be useful because of our viewpoint of the surroundings. Sometimes our context is such that it feels the people around us and the things around us don’t need what we have to offer in terms of time effort or money.

There’s actually a solution to that:

Change your context.

The fact is that we all have something to offer to the world. If you can’t see who you can help or what you can offer that would be truly helpful then change your context.

Don’t think people in your inner circle need your help, look outside that inner circle.

Don’t think you can make a difference at your job, change your job.

Don’t think your family needs your help because they’re pretty self-sufficient, don’t change your family of course 😊 but help other families who can use your help.

Don’t think you can make a difference in your current geographical location, change your location.

Can’t change your location? No worries. It’s a small world these days thanks to technology. Reach out and help others through your words and actions virtually.

The fact of the matter is there’s Always someone or something that can use what you have to offer. And just as true is that once you offer that help, you yourself will feel fulfilled. Guaranteed!

So ask yourself:

What’s in your hands and what are you going to do about it?

Have you ever noticed that you can think clearly when present in some spaces compared to others? Context really matters.

There’s a correlation of how clear your mind is to how clear (and clutter free) your environment is.

There’s a story that Bill Gates Sr. was once sitting down with his son Bill Gates Jr. as well as Warren Buffett and he asked them both to write one single word that has made them both successful. They both wrote down the exact same thing: Focus

It’s not a coincidence that people who are focused and clear minded are the ones who are the most successful in this world.

Many of us struggle to attain that focus because of the clutter in our minds. Now I’m not saying that by decluttering our environment, you will automatically become laser focused. However, I am 100% confident that it will help tremendously and it’s something that is very much in our control.

The challenge is of course that we live in a very materialistic society. Buying stuff has become an activity for many. A lot of the stuff we buy is not even out of necessity. We buy just because we need something to do. And because it gives us a temporary spike of pleasure that feels good in the moment.

Obviously the more we buy the more stuff we have the more cluttered our environment gets and the less clear and focused our minds get. It’s a vicious circle that is hard to break.

Let’s at least start with the awareness that if we want to be focused and achieve our goals, we can take the simple actionable step of removing some clutter to start clearing our minds.

 

When I was growing up, I remember my parents telling me that I must finish everything on my plate. Wasting food was just not acceptable.

I have never liked waste and continue to look upon it unfavorably when I see anything wasted – time, money, food, etc.

But having said that, my views on finishing my plate of food has changed over time.

Let me explain…

When you leave food on your plate, it goes to the garbage can. Chances are that many of us reasonable people will feel bad about wasting food, as we should, since we know in the back of our minds that there are people going hungry around the world. We should be thankful and blessed for the food that we have received and wasting it is definitely not a good thing. Agreed.

Having said that, there are times when you just get to a point where you know that you should not be putting more food in your mouth. You are full.

So why did you end up having more food on your plate then you could eat?

Sometimes it’s just not avoidable. For example, at a party where you are served food on a plate. For times like these, you just don’t have a choice as to the plate that was put in front of you. Or sometimes you just made a mistake and took too much food. You’re human. It happens.

The only choices you have at that point are:

1. Do you put it in the garbage can knowing that you are wasting food?
2. Do you put it in your body knowing that it’s not good for your body?

I used to be the person that would religiously finish his plate and would tell my kids to do the same.

As I have grown older, I have learned to respect my body more.

Your body is not a garbage can.

It’s true that it’s not good to waste food by putting it in the garbage but it’s worse to treat your body like a garbage can by ingesting food that your body doesn’t need

Same could be said for any other substance that’s not good for your body. The fact is that we have been given only one body and if we don’t treat it respectfully, we will suffer the consequences as we get older.

Be good to your body and be considerate of your future self. You deserve it!